I give myself the same gift every year.
Permission.
Permission to be authentic with my grief.
Permission to lean into the darkness while acknowledging it’s “OK to not be OK” for a while.
Permission to play my grief card and say “no” to any invitation or skip any activity that does not feel helpful to my healing process.
Permission to talk or not talk, cry or not cry, grieve or not grieve.
Permission to have a “no need to explain” exit plan for any situation.
Permission to not feel guilty about any emotions, feelings or outbursts that instantaneously surface without warning – or in how I choose to handle them.
Permission to forgive those who (while well-intentioned) tell me how I should feel. Everyone grieves differently. Everyone heals differently.
And most importantly…
Permission to be happy.
The holidays can be stressful enough without adding grief to the mix. Opening the gift of permission each year allows me to navigate the holidays successfully on my own terms, revise rituals and traditions to make the most of the season, and be OK with whatever comes my way.
Greatest. Gift. Ever.
Sending you love and peace this holiday season.
Such a beautiful and important gift always!
Thanks, Kathy. And one we can give ourselves all year long!
Thank you so much Lori. We lost our precious niece this year. We are still feeling every emotion you have described. The hardest for me is permission to be Happy.
(Amy Rubado is our friend and she sent this to me)
So sorry to hear about your loss, Sue. And yes, feeling any happiness can be tough…but if it happens to come your way, I say let it in:)
I love this! I forwarded it to several friends that really need this.
Thank you, Amy. I hope it helps.
2018 was a year of loss. Began with my beloved Dad in January, and then later in the year two friends in their fifties each fought and suffered greatly and then passed.
A few days ago another old friend from Hollywood days, a super sweet guy also in his fifties, died suddenly. Painful. Tragic. Hard. On so many levels. In 2019 I’m giving myself permission. Thx for this Lori. 💔