I give myself the same gift every year.

Permission.

Permission to be authentic with my grief.

Permission to lean into the darkness while acknowledging it’s “OK to not be OK” for a while.

Permission to play my grief card and say “no” to any invitation or skip any activity that does not feel helpful to my healing process.

Permission to talk or not talk, cry or not cry, grieve or not grieve.

Permission to have a “no need to explain” exit plan for any situation.

Permission to not feel guilty about any emotions, feelings or outbursts that instantaneously surface without warning – or in how I choose to handle them.

Permission to forgive those who (while well-intentioned) tell me how I should feel. Everyone grieves differently. Everyone heals differently.

And most importantly…

Permission to be happy.

The holidays can be stressful enough without adding grief to the mix. Opening the gift of permission each year allows me to navigate the holidays successfully on my own terms, revise rituals and traditions to make the most of the season, and be OK with whatever comes my way.

Greatest. Gift. Ever.

Sending you love and peace this holiday season.